You’re doing SO much, mama.
In fact, I’d be willing to bet that when you factor in the emotional labor, the unpaid caretaking, the self-care practices, the mental load you carry, and the healing work you’re so dedicated to, you are working as hard or harder than most people you know.
And yet, I bet you still battle The Demons of Never Enoughness more often than you’d like. This makes perfect sense. Day after day, not only are we fed BS images of what happy families, thriving businesses, and moms who “have their shit together” on social media and in advertising, but…
These are tough times, and the lion’s share of the cultural dysfunction is falling on mothers (especially mothers of color and other marginalized sub-groups of moms).
I realized a while back that I need a simple tool to turn to when The Demons show up (which is almost always when I’m depleted from overwork and/or sleep deprived). In my experience, this process gets easier the more often you use it and is a great way to cut through bullshit fast. Here’s what it looks like:
When you catch yourself scanning your life, gathering evidence that you’re not doing enough, try this:
One thing I know for sure is that we need to be spending less time judging our worth and worthiness based on the toxic and too-small-for-us narratives all around us, and more time deconstructing them and imagining new ones.
Motherhood and homemaking are FULL of shoulds, every one of which needs to be examined. When we take the time to deconstruct them, we often find that most aren’t aligned with our values, with the vibrant, juicy lives we want to be living, nor with our vision of the kind of world we’re here to help co-create for the next generation.
WE have to choose which narratives are worthy of us and our kids. Please don’t give that power away to people and institutions that don’t have your or your family’s best interests in mind.
You’re doing a beautiful job,